Just Benny
Can he ever be something more?
by Alex Banwell
Contemporary Christian Fiction with a subtle message, suitable for all.
Who is Benny Wellander?
To his mother, he’s her precious baby, forever in need of protection. To his sister, he’s ‘Pestie’, the kid who destroyed her happy childhood. To his classmates, he’s the quiet loner plagued by seizures. To his father, he’s barely visible; a constant disappointment.
Caught in a web of insecurity, Benny defines himself by his illness and the damage it’s wrought on his mind. But is he truly rubbish at everything? Or could he be worth loving?
Join Benny on a poignant journey of self-discovery as he seeks to understand his own worth. What will it take for him to break free from his labels and embrace the person he truly is?
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Viktor Steiner –
Emotional hangups
Benny’s dad, Ola Welander, rejects him. Janet, his mum, pampers him. His sister, Emma, loves her little ‘Pestie’ but finds him exasperating at times. Other kids mock ‘Weedy Welander’, all because he suffers from frequent epileptic seizures. As a result, Benny withdraws to the only place where he feels safe: his mother’s arms. ‘I’m rubbish at everything’ are his favourite words.
School looms as a terrifying monster. Slowly, Benny sidles in and advances from class to class. Only Damo, the new boy, shows sympathy. But will Ola allow Benny to have a black friend?
A new family, the Thompsons, moves in nearby. City people – very suspect. Ola forbids Benny to talk to the strikingly attractive, sixteen-year-old daughter, Nettie. But somehow little encounters occur, and Benny, who’s only twelve, enjoys her kindness. When it becomes evident that Nettie is pregnant, the Welanders see it as confirmation of their aversion and reaffirm their ban on any contact.
Appraisal
Alex Banwell’s skillful portrayal captures the emotional turmoil experienced by Benny, his parents, and friends during his formative years. In Just Benny, the author uses commonplace events – a dropped ice cream cone, a fall from a bike, his sister caught kissing, a neighbor’s taunt, a dare to smoke – to show Benny’s challenges and delve into the world of feelings.
Benny
Benny’s insecurity, unpredictable seizures and consequent severe learning difficulties mean he doesn’t dare to do things other boys his age master without difficulty. He’s deeply hurt by his dad’s rejection and the taunts of other boys. Although Damo’s teasing empathy offers some solace, Benny especially values Nettie’s simple friendship in their brief meetings.
Societal pressures on relationships, such as the ostracizing of teenage pregnancies, are too complex for Benny to understand. But he’s convinced that every baby deserves its own loving mother. Thus, in a remarkably daring move, he takes the bus to the maternity hospital and convinces Nettie not to give her newborn daughter, whom he names Beth, away for adoption.
Father
Ola vowed never to become like his alcoholic father – violent, unpredictable and hostile. But – heartbroken that Benny isn’t the son he longed for – he finds himself shunning him and frequently escapes to the pub. How can he overcome his bitterness? He reluctantly accepts his wife’s persuasion to relax his rules about Benny seeing Nettie. And when Beth’s father appears on the scene, causing Benny to come home in tears of desolation, Ola summons the courage to see him in his room.
He sat down beside Benny and put an arm around his shoulders. ‘I’m proud of you, Benny. You’re having to show maturity that’s far beyond your years.’ He smiled ruefully. ‘I have to admit that until today, I wasn’t sure whether you had it in you.’
He then makes the dramatic suggestion that Benny might do his dreaded work experience with him at his garage.
Mother
Janet, too, has her hangups. She feels passionate love for Benny, whom she still sees as a helpless little child, although he is now a teenager. It pains her to watch him struggle not only with his physical and intellectual weaknesses, but now with the despair of a broken friendship. It takes great effort for her to control her behaviour.
Girlfriend
Charming and popular, Nettie enjoyed being the envy of her city friends, who admired her relationship with Simon, the most handsome boy around. But she didn’t reckon with getting pregnant. Nor with her family’s despairing decision to escape the scandal by moving to a little village, where she finds no one accepts her. Her chance encounter with Benny brings a new aspect to her life: sensitive, caring friendship. Later, his passionate love for baby Beth warms her heart. But she is heartbroken by his parents’ animosity. The unexpected arrival of Beth’s father, who tries to win her back and form a little family, adds to her consternation.
‘There is no me and Simon, and there never could be. There never should have been. Except that now I’ve got her, I could never wish I hadn’t had Beth.’
‘She’s great, Nettie.’ Beth was becoming heavier in his arms, and Benny knew she was ready for sleep.
‘Yes she is, and it was you who helped me see that. You’ve taught me so much.’
‘Me?’ He couldn’t help being surprised. ‘I can’t teach no one nothing.’
‘Yes you can.’ She beamed at him. ‘And d’you know the most amazing thing of all?’ He shook his head, more confused than ever. ‘You’ve taught me what it means to love and be loved.’
Pastor Tim
A new aspect develops: Benny is invited by a friend to his church youth group. The stories he hears there about the mysterious miracle-worker puzzle him. Noticing this desperately shy newcomer, the leader, Pastor Tim, befriends him and offers to help him understand the Bible.
‘So if Jesus healed them… D’you reckon he could take my epilepsy away and make me normal?’
‘You are normal, Benny.’
‘No, I’m not,’ Benny stated. ‘It’s done stuff to my brain. I’m rubbish at school, and I don’t remember stuff. Sometimes my dad gets mad with me cos he has to explain stuff loads cos I don’t get it the first time. Or sometimes the second, or the third.’
Benny gave a half smile and Tim allowed himself a chuckle. It seemed to set Benny at ease.
You’ll have to read the book to discover how things work out…
Recommendation
Just Benny brought me to reflect on my own parenting shortcomings and to be more sensitive to the complexity of other people’s behaviour. This book will fascinate all parents, as well as people who care for children with special needs. For those open to faith, the low-key Christian element is a welcome addition.